Thursday, October 17, 2013

Day 26: How It All Went So Very Wrong

    Recently, I have felt compelled to pray - for patience. Some part of my brain thinks I need it. I think I already have enough to be a martyr. Apparently not. I let it slip when I was praying at work today too. "Lord, give me the strength and patience (oh shit, why'd I say that?! Too late now, better roll with it) to handle these things in my life to make positive changes. I almost never say "amen" because I never feel like I am quite done. I'll think of something else, and I always do.

   From what I can tell, praying for patience does not instantly bestow upon thee, patience. No. You get trials, and through living those trials, you then receive patience. Because you had to, or else. I do indeed have a lot of patience. Anyone who has met my husband knows that I absolutely had to or else I'd be a widow. Or in prison. Probably both. And my son is exactly like his father and me combined. Who remembers when I was little and would scream my lungs out when I got mad? Yeah, my son started doing that this week. Prefect angel I was not.

   My life as of right now is nothing short of obnoxious. I am usually ok going with the flow, recently I have become irate because no one will see things my way. Sadly, I am right 99 times out of 100. At least at home. I don't know if I am being overly sensitive to everything, or if everyone under my roof is deliberately trying to piss me off. Either way, I need more patience to deal with it, which means that events will arise to create more patience within me. yay.

  For example; my husband was supposed to fill up our water containers while I was at work. He did not. No dishes, no flushing, no clean hands, no cooking, no drinking water, basically we can only do 50% of everything. I will go and fill them up tomorrow, but simple requests should be filled simply.

On the bright side, tomorrow is Friday, my only day off this week, and I get to spend it with my friend doing my laundry and showering. Also, come hell or high-water I am going to get out of the damn house. I am going to go out, I don't care if I sit by myself all night I am not sitting here. I need a break, I am in desperate need of a little fun and tom foolery.

That is all for tonight, I can't spend another moment thinking about this! Have a fabulous night and God Bless!

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